I am absolutely exhausted and I have to preach tomorrow. I facilitated a planning session last night and this morning. We accomplished a lot. I still struggle with two session members who don't get spiritual growth. I am also trying to explain small spiritual formation groups. Those who have been a part of a group understand the importance of these groups in our spiritual growth; those who haven't don't understand why going to church on Sunday and a once a month Bible study isn't enough. I don't sense a lot of spiritual hunger. I sense a lot of desire for fellowship. I try to listen and hear what these two are saying: God speaks through those we don't want to hear, too. I feel like I am swimming upstream through jello. I have to remember to focus on those who get it and pray that I am on the right path and that others will understand. One member said, well, session is a small group. Now, I have been trying to move us to more of a place of sharing and spiritual growth, but it isn't a spiritual formation group. Some are just satisfied with where they are.
On the other hand, I keep saying "God, I don't want to fully commit to this: I want to keep traveling. I want to focus on photography. I want to not have to give so much. I want a life."